Useless Installation Directions

Today I installed two new wall mounted light fixtures on my front stoop to replace the old ones. The lightbulbs had burned out in one of them, so I decided to change the light fixtures sooner than I originally had planned. Yes, changing the entire light fixture because the lightbulbs burned out, is a little extreme, even for me, but truthfully the old one was so thoroughly rusted, I could not get it apart to change the bulbs. I wanted new light fixtures that would be more modern and allow for more lightbulbs, so more light would be produced anyway.

I’ve installed six light fixtures already, two wall mounted and four hung from the ceiling, so these two should not be a big deal. I keep forgetting just how useless all directions that come with these things tend to be though. Yes, as a female, even when I am sure of what I am doing, I still tend to read the instructions. I’m funny that way.

Why are the directions so useless? First, the one type of direction I would like for them to have, they almost never have, and that is how to change the lightbulbs. I’m serious about that. I’ve lost track of the number of fixtures where I’ve uselessly unscrewed various finials and nuts in hopes of separating some piece that inevitably is welded together to try to find a place that is large enough to reach the lightbulb. The new light fixtures I installed today are no exception. I unscrewed several finials only to realize a piece was welded. I finally realized it is possible just to stick my hand through the bottom opening and carefully swing the light piece to change the lightbulbs, but I have to be careful. Another annoyance with these fixtures is that the glass sides are held in such a way that during shipping, some of the slipped out of place. Part of the reason I was unscrewing finials was to figure out the best way to get the glass sides back into place. Again, I ended up doing it really carefully and slowly through the bottom.

The second reasons most of these directions are useless is that evidently companies can only afford to print one set of directions for their entire line of fixtures. Below is the single piece of paper that came with these fixtures.

Assembly directions for evidently every fixture they sell

Assembly directions for evidently every fixture they sell

One sheet of paper for five different types of fixtures. Seriously? Does it really cost that much money to print a different one depending on the actual fixture in the box? Perhaps if they did, YOU COULD ACTUALLY READ THE DIRECTIONS. Here is a close up of the directions that, in theory, pertain to my fixture.

My fixture's installation directions

My fixture’s installation directions

Yes, on the back were written directions also, but they can be summarized as 1. Turn off breaker. 2. Black wire to black wire. 3. White wire to white wire. 4. Ground wire to green grounding nut. These are of course great, and you, of course, can get them from anywhere on the internet. The best part of all of these directions is that they are somewhat wrong. If you look at the drawing above, the fixture hangs from a crossbar that is mounted to the wall box. This is completely standard. HOWEVER, this is the crossbar that came with my light fixture.

Light fixture's crossbar

Light fixture’s crossbar

Needless to say, this threw me for a loop. I figured out the reason for it fairly quickly. Crossbars are always mounted to the wall vertically, but the new light fixtures required a horizontal mount. Thus one bar is to mount to the box, and the other attaches to the fixture. Great, no problem, but it really would have been nice if, oh I don’t know, THE DIRECTIONS HAD MENTIONED THIS IS LITTLE CHANGE FROM STANDARD. Even better, one of the fixtures had the screws on the wrong bar. That is, in one of the boxes, the screws needed to mount the fixture to its crossbar, were screwed into the other crossbar. Yes, I did figure out after several frustrating minutes that it does make a difference which crossbar goes to which. It affects the way the crossbar sits in the box and hides behind the fixture.

These directions weren’t even the worst ones that I have seen. The chandeliers that I installed had really useless directions. This is mainly because like all fixtures, they came with the standard directions of black wire to black wire and white wire to white wire. The problem was that the chandeliers did not have either a black or white wire. They had silver wires with clear coating. One had a little sticker labeled “N”, and the other had a little sticker labeled “L”. I just looked at these things wondering WHAT IN THE FLYING FIG IS N AND L? I know what black wire, white wire, bare wire, and even red wire from the wall are. So now there is N and L? Being the chemical engineer I am, I’m think of black as the “hot” wire and white wire as the “cold” wire, so why aren’t they labeled H and C? Ten minutes of internet searching later, I find out “L” means live or line, depending on your source, and thus connects to the black wire, and “N” mean neutral, and thus it connects to the white wire. However, most importantly, WHY THE HECK COULDN’T THE INSTRUCTIONS THAT CAME WITH THE DAMN FIXTURE SAY THAT?

The light fixtures I installed today did however have completely unneeded directions. Below is a photo of the back of the fixture.

Back of the light fixture

Back of the light fixture

The top sticker on the lower right has the completely unhelpful directions “Wall Mount Only [up arrow] This End Up.” Now if you only saw the fixture like this, those might actually be useful directions. However, if you look at the whole fixture, you would notice that the interior of the fixture where the lightbulbs screw in, hangs from the top of the fixture. Therefore, anyone with a passing understanding of GRAVITY would figure out that that end has to be up. So, I’m so glad they put that sticker on there.

Let me be clear, these directions are for do-it-yourselfers like myself. A professional electrician doesn’t need any of them. Thus, why are the directions so damn crappy? Are they to discourage do-it-yourselfers? Do they actually think these directions are helpful? Exactly how much would it cost to print different and readable directions for each type of fixture? Exactly how much would it cost for the design and/or manufacturing department to keep the department who creates these completely unhelpful directions informed when they change important aspects of the design, like using wires labeled N and L instead of black and white wires?

I did eventually get the new fixtures installed, no thanks to the directions. They look lovely, and no duct tape was required, just persistence and experimentation. Each fixture holds four lights as opposed to the old fixtures, which held two, so now there is more light produced. I think they might look slightly modern for the house, but I am planning to eventually replace the front door, and then I think they will work better. Also, the house really needs to be painted, but they has to wait a bit. WIthout further ado, the old and new light fixtures.

Old light fixture

Old light fixture

Front stoop with old light fixtures

Front stoop with old light fixtures

New light fixture

New light fixture

Front stoop with new light fixtures

Front stoop with new light fixtures

Smoke Detector Stupidness

Last night at 3 a.m. my smoke detectors went off. There really is nothing like being awakened from a dead sleep to that extremely high pitched chirp and a female voice saying “fire, fire.” I, of course, immediately got out of bed and went in search of this supposed fire. There was none to be found. However my smoke detectors assured me there was. I then had to go through the house and pull all five of them from their wiring and in some cases pull out the batteries because pushing the button would not hush them. At 3 a.m., that was so much fun.

When I bought this house it did not have any smoke detectors. It had two wall mounted holders for smoke detectors, one in each the downstairs and upstairs hall. There were none in the bedrooms, and there was no wiring for interconnected ones. I decided early on that as I renovated the house, I would install interconnected wired smoke detectors and bring the house up to current code, even though it was not required. I’m an engineer that way. During Phase 2 of renovations, because the ceiling downstairs had to be opened to install a structural beam, the house lost grandfather status, and interconnected wired smoke detectors now became required by the County. No problem. I was already planning to do it. When it came time to install them, I decided to get combination smoke and carbon monoxide detectors. I had to buy all new ones anyway, so I might as well go for full protection.

This leads me to last night and my need to rant. My detectors are Kiddie brand. I mention the brand because there is an oligopoly of sorts on household fire alert and response equipment. All of them seem to work the same and have the same flaws. Modern houses generally will have interconnected smoke detectors so that if one detects smoke, all the detectors will go into alarm. There should also be one detector in each bedroom and in each hall. Interconnected fire detectors and their location are not universally adopted building code requirements for new construction but are a good idea. If you have a large house, it is possible for one to go in alarm and not awaken a sleeping person in another part of the house. Research has also shown that children do not necessarily wake to a smoke detector at all, in particular the tone. This is partially the reason why voice alarms have been added, but with children, personalized voice alarms with the parent’s voice may be needed to insure children are awakened.

If my detectors detect fire, they set off one set of chirps and say “fire, fire.” If they detect carbon monoxide, they set off another set of chirps and say “carbon monoxide.” If the battery is low, another chirp and “low battery.” Then there is some complicated series of chirp sequences to denote if it was previously in alarm, has malfunctioned, needs replacement, etc. that NO ONE COULD POSSIBLY DISTINGUISH THE MEANING OF AT 3 A.M. Mine were definitely yelling fire last night. As I ran around with a stool trying to figure out what the problem was, the hush button was not working at all. At one point, one of them said carbon monoxide, but I have no idea which one because they are all blaring at me at 3 a.m. The units also have some complicated series of LED blinks to denote in which mode (or possibly mood) it is. This is great, but they are IMPOSSIBLE TO UNDERSTAND AT 3 A.M. Also, as far as I could tell or at least understand, there was no way to figure out which specific detector set off the alarm and thus which one was malfunctioning. Maybe the LED is supposed to tell me this, but I couldn’t figure it out when all I wanted to do is stop the awful noise being blared at me.

Thus if any person who happens to work in smoke detector design happens to read this, these things are too complicated to understand when there is some malfunction or inaccurate alarm. I appreciate the voice that says fire, carbon monoxide, or low battery tells you what the supposed problem is. That makes it much easier to understand than which series of chirps are being blared. However, if you are trying to track down a malfunction, it is impossible. Stopping the blare seems to be impossible short of removing all sources of power. For interconnected detectors, I want and need to known which one started the alarm. I can’t figure out the problem if I don’t know that, ESPECIALLY WHEN IT IS 3 A.M. WHICH IS EVIDENTLY THE ONLY TIME DETECTORS HAVE A FLASE ALARM OR LOW BATTERY.

That ends my rant. While I’m on the subject of fire detectors though, please remember to change the battery every six months. Also, please remember when the detector itself needs to be replaced, never throw it in the trash. Smoke detectors contain a small amount of a radioactive substance. They are perfectly fine to have in your house, but they should not be disposed of in a landfill. Find an appropriate place to dispose of them. [Update: Please see my post Household Hazardous Waste Disposal on how I eventually disposed of my malfunctioning smoke detector.]

Mulching Plant Tour

About a month ago, I got a chance to tour a recycling plant. This Arlington County municipal recycling plant focuses on recycling yard waste. In the spring, Arlington County has curbside collection of yard waste in paper bags including invasive vines, leaves, dead plants, pine cones, etc. In the fall, Arlington County picks up leaves in paper bags from residents and also from curbside vacuum collection. All year long, Arlington County also picks up brush curbside. All of these waste streams are treated separately at the plant, and the plant also handles dirt and rock excavated during utility work.

The plant manager said he likes to think of the plant as a reutilization plant because something goes in, they process it, and then something goes out. Their operation is really quite impressive, especially when its 2.7 acres total yard size is considered. It is mainly this plant size that limits their ability to accept more waste for processing. Their biggest issue is dirt from pipe breaks etc. that is processed here. They reuse the processed dirt and rock for backfill, but if they can’t find a use for it, they have to dispose of it in a landfill.

The yard waste has to get to 140°F to kill any invasive weeds. Because the plant is located near a residential area, they do not accept food waste because of the odor it produces. They use lime on the yard waste solely for odor control. [Lime the inorganic material, which generally means calcium oxide (CaO) with some calcium hydroxide (Ca(OH)2) not lime the fruit.] With the leaf waste, they achieve a 66% volume reduction to the leaf mulch product. Leaf bag collection mulch is mixed with dirt for final product.

Tub grinder that processes leaf, brush, wood, and spring yard waste

Tub grinder that processes leaf, brush, wood, and spring yard waste

Dirt processing machine that sorts material by size

Dirt processing machine that sorts material by size

Stone crusher machine

Stone crusher machine

Material going into trommel screen for separation. The trommel screen sorts dirt and big aggregate.

Material going into trommel screen for separation. The trommel screen sorts dirt and big aggregate.

Material coming out of trommel screen after separation

Material coming out of trommel screen after separation

As is often the case, fixing a piece of equipment involves a guy standing on the bucket of a front loader using a pole to move things.

As is often the case, fixing a piece of equipment involves a guy standing on the bucket of a front loader using a pole to move things.

Rock and concrete after separation

Rock and concrete after separation

Dirt for separation by size

Dirt for separation by size

Leaf mulch product

Leaf mulch product

Wood mulch product

Wood mulch product

Yard waste mulch product

Yard waste mulch product

The plant uses the product dirt to create this vegetable garden. It had wonderful looking vegetables, and in the past, they have entered the vegetables in the county fair.

The plant uses the product dirt to create this vegetable garden. It had wonderful looking vegetables, and in the past, they have entered the vegetables in the county fair.

Cambridge, Maryland

I visited Cambridge, Maryland this afternoon. It is a cute little town on the Choptank River on Maryland’s Eastern Shore. I have to admit the town makes me a little sad because it is a historic town and many of its buildings are in disrepair. They seem to be having a bit of a revitalization, which is great, and I hope it continues. Many of the downtown buildings have been renovated and have new businesses. Many of the gorgeous, historic homes have either been maintained all along or have been renovated. There are still many buildings and homes though that need some serious help.

Downtown Cambridge

Downtown Cambridge

Law Offices

Law Offices

High Spot

High Spot

Cambridge Creek towards Choptank River

Cambridge Creek towards Choptank River

Cambridge Creek towards inlet

Cambridge Creek towards inlet

Cambridge Municipal Yacht Basin

Cambridge Municipal Yacht Basin

Choptank River Lighthouse

Choptank River Lighthouse

Choptank River Bridge

Choptank River Bridge

Boat Ride from Chincoteague Island

I took a two hour cruise around the waterways of Chincoteague Island and Assateague Island today with Chincoteague Cruises and Nature Tours. It was a lovely day for a cruise, and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Unfortunately we didn’t find any dolphins, but we did see some birds, Chincoteague ponies, horseshoe crabs, and jellyfish. We saw lots and lots of jellyfish in fact, such that I would never swim in the area where we cruised. The area is just beautiful, and the beauty becomes more clear when you can get away from all the tourists.

Assateague Island

Assateague Island

Chincoteague Ponies with Cattle Egrets sitting on top of them

Chincoteague Ponies with Cattle Egrets sitting on top of them

Chincoteague Ponies

Chincoteague Ponies

Assateague Island Lighthouse

Assateague Island Lighthouse

Jellyfish

Jellyfish

Female and male horseshoe crabs

Female and male horseshoe crabs

Female horseshoe crab

Female horseshoe crab

Dead horseshoe crab

Dead horseshoe crab

NASA Wallops launchpad

NASA Wallops launchpad

Chincoteague National Wildlife Refuge

Chincoteague National Wildlife Refuge is lovely, but it really should just be called mosquito paradise. If you go here and want to walk on any of the trails, insect spray will be necessary. I hate bug spray, but the mosquitoes are so bad, even I resorted to using it. However, the walk around the swamp was nice except for the mosquitoes. There were more swamp rose mallowes (Hibiscus moscheutos) in bloom than I have ever seen. I saw a few birds, but not that many. I would guess however that this is a great area to bird during migration season.

Swamp

Swamp

Swamp with swamp roses

Swamp with swamp roses

Swamp Rose Mallow (Hibiscus moscheutos)

Swamp Rose Mallow (Hibiscus moscheutos)

Swamp Rose Mallow (Hibiscus moscheutos)

Swamp Rose Mallow (Hibiscus moscheutos)

grass

grass

ferns

ferns

Common Cattail (Typha latifolia)

Common Cattail (Typha latifolia)

Common Cattail (Typha latifolia)

Common Cattail (Typha latifolia)

Glossy Ibis (Plegadis falcinellus)

Glossy Ibis (Plegadis falcinellus)

Greater Yellowlegs, Semipalmated Sandpiper, and another shorebird

Greater Yellowlegs (Tringa melanoleuca), Semipalmated Sandpiper (Calidris pusilla), and another shorebird

 

Shenandoah National Park

I spent the day hiking and driving in Shenandoah National Park in Virginia. It is a beautiful park, and the weather was perfect. I was also treated to many insects going nuts on the flowers. The park has wonderful views of the area, including views that make it clear how the Blue Ridge Mountains got their name. I have identified the insects that I can. If anyone who happens to read this can identify or correct my identification, please contact me. I love to get the identifications correct. Edited to add: Thanks to Derek and friends on Twitter who have helped me identify the animals on this page!]

Shenandoah valley

Beautiful views

The Shenandoah River makes an appearance twice in this view

The Shenandoah River makes an appearance twice in this view

Panorama view

Panorama view

Blue Ridges indeed

Blue Ridges indeed

forest

Beautiful forests

Crack in a rock seems like a good place for a fern to take root

Crack in a rock seems like a good place for a fern to take root

red berry tree

Berries of some tree

Millipede, Narceus americanus-annularis-complex

Bee ?

Bee ?

Bee ?

Bee ?

Evidently a very good thistle with an Easter Tiger Swallowtail and two bees

Evidently a very good thistle with an Easter Tiger Swallowtail and two bees

Eastern Tiger Swallowtail

Eastern Tiger Swallowtail (Papilio glaucus)

Cabbage White

Cabbage White (Pieris rapae)

Pearl Crescent

Pearl Crescent (Phyciodes tharos)

Hummingbird Clearwing (Hemaris thysbe)

Luray Caverns

Unlike Skyline Caverns, which I visited yesterday, Luray Caverns let visitors take self guided tours through the caverns. This was very nice, as there were employees along the way to ask questions of if you had one, but I didn’t have to listen to a guide telling me what the various formations look like. Luray Caverns has fantastic stalactite, stalagmite, and column formations. It has a couple of small ponds that create perfect mirrors for the formations above, and it is absolutely beautiful and amazing to view. Luray Caverns also has the Stalacpipe Organ, which plays music by hammering stalactites instead of using pipes. It is rather interesting to hear.

Cavern formations

Cavern formations

Flowstone with columns

Flowstone with columns

Up close view of flowstone

Up close view of flowstone

Drapery stalactite

Drapery stalactite

Drapery stalactite

Drapery stalactite

Mirrored lake

Mirrored lake

Mirrored lake

Mirrored lake

Two huge columns

Two huge columns

Close up view of column in photo above

Close up view of column in photo above

Even more up close view of column in two above photos

Even more up close view of column in two above photos

Flowstone cross section

Flowstone cross section

Stalactite cross section

Stalactite cross section

Stalactite cross section

Stalactite cross section

Below is a video of the Stalacpipe Organ. It has a few still photos of the organ’s parts, and then a video with audio of the Stalacpipe Organ playing. Turn the volume way up to hear it.

Skyline Caverns

I visited Skyline Caverns today in Front Royal, Virginia. I have decided that caverns and other attractions that have some science involved need to have two different tours: one for people interested in the science, such as the geology of cave formation, and others who just want to see the pretty stuff and be told that a particular formation looks like Snoopy. Skyline Caverns has some nice formations and some neat underground rivers and lakes, The lakes are really neat to see because the water is completely still and forms a mirror reflecting all the formations above it. The best part of the tour of Skyline Caverns was the anthodites, which are absolutely beautiful six-sided calcite crystals. According to the tour guide, their existence was first discovered in Skyline Caverns by Walter Amos, the geologist who discovered the caverns.

Underground lake

Underground lake

Underground lake

Underground lake

Flowstone

Flowstone

Drapery stalactites

Drapery stalactites

Stalactites

Stalactites

Water dropping from forming stalactites

Water dropping from forming stalactites

Anthodites

Anthodites

Anthodites

Anthodites

Tiny growing anthodites

Tiny growing anthodites

Anthodites

Anthodites

Anthodites with moss

Anthodites with moss

Science Education with a Corpse Flower

During my two weeks of daily visits to the US Botanical Garden (USBG) to see the corpse flower, I talked to many people about the corpse flower at the USBG, on Twitter, on Facebook, and face to face in many other places. My website got record traffic. The news media ran stories about the corpse flower. On July 22, the day it was in peak bloom, there was a mass of people waiting, including me, to get into USBG before it opened at 10 am. My post for that day is titled Corpse Flower: July 22 am because I intended to get a second set of photos that afternoon. However, when I went back that afternoon at 5 pm, there was a line three blocks long of people waiting to get in to see it. I decided I didn’t have time to wait in that line. People were clearly interested in this plant. It was a big thing. I and thousands of other people were watching this plant every day on a live cam. To be clear, while this plant did grow amazingly fast, it was not so fast that you could see it growing if you just stared at it. We were watching a plant sit there, and many of us were obsessed.

Even better than this obsession watching it, was people’s interest in knowing more about it. Everyone wanted to know when it would bloom and why does it smell. Many people also wanted to know where it was from, was it really the largest flower in the world, where is its leaves, and how does it reproduce. Many of the people I talked to were perfect strangers who did not have a science background or would normally be interested in science type topics, but they found this plant interesting. It was a perfect opportunity to educate people about science, nature, and conservation. While I was happy to see how some employees and volunteers at USBG responded to all the interest, I have to admit I was really disappointed at some very squandered opportunities of which USBG on the whole did not take advantage.

Part of my disappointment with USBG is that I am comparing it to what happened when a corpse flower named Lois bloomed at Houston Museum of Natural Science (HMNS) in 2010. HMNS set up a live cam also and also set up a Twitter feed to run on the same webpage as the live cam where any tweets with a designated hashtag would show up, so people could discuss the corpse flower. Like many corpse flowers, Lois was unpredictable and seemed to be taking too long to bloom. So while everyone was waiting for Lois to finally bloom, someone not associated with HMNS, set up a parody Twitter account called @CorpzFlowrLois, and the first tweet was “Maybe I’ll bloom, maybe I won’t.” This pretty much summed up the plant. The tweets from @CorpzFlowrLois kept getting funnier and funnier as Lois was given a diva personality complete with a personal assistant who was constantly late bringing her her cappuccino, an ex-boyfriend back in Sumatra who wanted her back, and the real life HMNS horticulturist whom she thought touched her too often. HMNS had no idea who was behind @CorpzFlowrLois, but they just went with it and linked to the account on their website with a disclaimer because as @CorpzFlowrLois got more and more followers, HMNS got more and more admission-paying visitors to the museum as well as website visitors. HMNS hosted webinars and educated everyone about the corpse flower and the related science.

Thus, it is probably slightly unfair for me to compare USBG to HMNS because partially thanks to @CorpzFlowrLois, Houston and the internet went absolutely nuts over Lois. I saw two different parody Twitter accounts set up for USBG’s corpse flower, but neither of them were as prolific or as funny as @CorpzFlowrLois. Also, for whatever reason, USBG did not embrace social media at all. Even though they knew they were going to get more visitors and interest because of the corpse flower, they didn’t seem to know what to do with it. The fact that they don’t charge admission may have something to do with their response. However, they also didn’t do what I think would be incredibly easy things to help educate people and satisfy their curiosity. They had two small posters set on either side of the corpse flower with some information about and photos of corpse flowers. They passed out pamphlets with some information and also had some information and photos on their website. However the information was somewhat basic and did not answer many of the questions I constantly heard people ask them. They also did not have many photos, and to be blunt, I think my photos were much better. When I talked to people at USBG, I always referred them to my website to see more photos, especially if they wanted to be able to see the progression of it growing as you couldn’t do that on USBG’s website.

People, including myself, were asking them everyday if the corpse flower was still growing or how tall it was. The staff measured the height and width of the corpse flower daily if not more often, so generally the staff member who was near the corpse flower would know the latest information and could answer those questions. While I suppose I should have suggested it, I don’t know why they didn’t just set up a white board or post on the website the growth information so people wouldn’t have to find a staff member to ask. People wanted to know more about the reason for the smell and how the plant reproduced, but the information that USBG had was minimal.

However, my greatest annoyance with USBG was with a few of the staff members. To be clear, most of the ones to which I either talked or listened, were knowledgable and great, if somewhat exhausted from the nonstop questions. However I heard two different staff members not only not take advantage to educate but also just plain use wrong terminology. On one of my daily corpse flower visits, I heard a man tell some people it was the largest flower in the world. I turned around, smiled, and said it is actually the largest unbranched inflorescence. He said well yes, of course, that is actually a spathe, but he finds it best to avoid technical terms around non-technical people. I later realized he was actually a staff member, but he didn’t have his ID badge displayed prominently. He said he was plant educator and if you use technical terms, which evidently includes spathe and spadix, then people get disinterested and confused. I said I found the opposite to be true, if the subject is explained well, then people can not only understand technical terms but want to know more. For example, if you explain that what they are looking at is not actually a flower, then people want to know where the flowers are and why. Further, if you give a person the wrong information like calling the copse flower the largest flower in the world, then how exactly did you educate them?

This is not just my opinion though of people wanting to know the technical terms and full explanation, it is my experience. As I stated, I talked to complete strangers while at USBG. Many times our conversation would start off because someone would state to their friend or just out loud to whomever “I wonder when it is going to bloom” or “why does it smell.” When I could do so without seeming to be a know-it-all or intruding in their conversation, I would engage them in conversation and educate them when I could. If the question was about when it was going to bloom, I would often show them some of my photos on my iPhone and describe the changes. I would always state I am no expert, but here is how it has changed. I would also state what I heard from staff and what I could observe, such as there was one last sheath (green petal like structure) that needed to fall or the staff member said it grew another six inches yesterday, and it needs to stop growing before it will bloom. I had wonderful, sometimes long conversations with people, and I always used proper botanical words when I knew them, showing the people how the structure we were waiting to open was actually a spathe that was protecting the real flowers inside it. Never once did a person get disinterested or tell me they didn’t understand me. They just asked me more and more questions that I tried to answer if I could. Many times while talking with one or two people, I would essentially draw an audience, and 15 minutes later I was surrounded by people all wanting to know more about the plant. I would always be forced to give everyone a disclaimer that I am not a botanist, I am just obsessed with the corpse flower and spend too much time on the internet.

When talking about the copse flower, if you just call it a flower, then you can’t really explain why it smells or other topics people were so interested in knowing. Sometimes when talking to people I would use the word blossom initially instead of spathe. I did that so that I did not incorrectly call it a flower, but once I talked more about it, I could explain how it was really an inflorescence. When talking about the corpse flower to people, I think back to high school chemistry where students are originally taught the Bohr model of the atom. The teachers explain, this model is not correct. but it was a good way to initially describe the atom, and later students will be confused with the quantum model of the atom because no one really understands the quantum model of the atom. As the statistician George E.P. Box stated “essentially, all models are wrong, but some are useful.” Thus calling the corpse flower a flower is a wrong model, and it can be useful, if and only if, the true structure of it is later described.

I did not write this blog post to bash USBG. I really appreciate how they set up the live cam, had extended hours (although I wish they had extended their hours on the night it actually bloomed), and made their staff available to educate people who came to see this magnificent plant. I just wish they had taken more advantage of the amazing opportunity to educate people who would normally not come to a botanical garden about nature and science. It can be difficult to interest people in nature and science, and when something comes along that grabs people’s interest, you have to take advantage to educate. I took advantage of it to talk to and educate friends and complete strangers about the science of this fascinating plant and how amazing nature is, and it was a wonderful experience that I will never forget.